• Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer

Productive Flourishing

  • New Here
  • Momentum app
  • Books
  • Services
  • Blog
  • Free Planners
  • Quiz

Your Happiness Counts

By Charlie Gilkey on December 18, 2009 19 Comments
Last updated on October 29, 2018

 Your Happiness Counts - Productive Flourishing | Your happiness counts. You know this, but are you applying that knowledge? www.productiveflourishing.com/your-happiness-counts/

Looking at the title of the post, you’re probably thinking, “Duh! Of course it counts!”

Really? You know this in theory, but I’m betting you don’t apply it as often as you should.

How many times have you tried to come up with other reasons to do something besides the fact that it makes you feel good?

How many times have you taken on work that makes you miserable because you’ve discounted your unhappiness in favor of how much money you’ll bring in?

How many times have you decided not to do something because you wanted to do it and felt like you should be “responsible” or “mature” by doing something you didn’t want to do?

How many times have you second-guessed how and why you enjoyed something because the pure enjoyment of it wasn’t enough?

How many of your decisions are based on your belief that you don’t deserve to be happy?

I hope you take the time to dig into the questions and have the courage to answer them honestly.

I could go on with questions like this all day. They come up with me, my clients, and my friends frequently. If you’re of the fairer sex, they probably come up for you every day.

We live in a schizophrenic society and we’re all messed up when it comes to happiness. We want to be happy, but we think it should be earned or deserved or hard to come by. We’ve been told to suck it up and be big boys and girls. We’re fed tales of how hard it was for those that came before us. Our world traditions feature humble, compassionate, and gentle people, and, at the same time, we idolize the stoic hero with a stiff upper lip.

Happiness shouldn’t be our only consideration, but it should count. We shouldn’t discount the misery we go through in a day because we make a certain number of dollars so we can buy a certain number of things. Sure, we might have to go through that misery one way or the other (for now), but we should acknowledge how we feel about it. If we don’t, it’s a sure way to continue along the path of misery — and we miss out on the opportunities that take us straight to happiness.

Being happy counts. Feeling good counts. Enjoying the moment counts. Singing a silent song of joy counts. They count without qualification or justification.

It’s simple but not easy: allow yourself to be happy and at peace or force yourself to be miserable and discordant. Your choice is not manifested mentally — it’s manifested through action.

You can start acting like your happiness counts today as well as you can tomorrow. Will you?

Learn why it's important for you and your business to find the space to have joy and be at peace. #productiveflourishing #happiness #selfcare

Previous Post: Last Chance To Get Coaching Sessions At The 2009 RatePrevious
Next Post: %$titleNext

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Armen Shirvanian says

    December 18, 2009 at 10:56 am

    Hi Charlie.

    I agree with this. I make sure I do the things that are in line with where happiness resides for me. It makes a big difference in how I am able to do things. If I see my energy low or something like that, I know to not even try for big action at that time, because it is like pushing harder on the gas pedal when the car is out of gas. The gas has to be put back in first.

    Happiness is something we have to use when it is there, because it is like potential energy we can convert to kinetic energy.

    It sure does count.
    .-= Armen Shirvanian´s last blog ..You Don’t Know What Works Until You Fully Try =-.

    Reply
  2. Jason Cohen says

    December 18, 2009 at 11:29 am

    Guilty! I need to print this out and post it on the wall.

    For others who found themselves nodding along, you might also find relief in this Inc Magazine article about “Impostor Syndrome.” I’ll be writing about this as well, but the short version is that successful people tend to discount their successes, choosing to suffer and work rather than revel and be happy.

    For me your piece and this one are related; both help put things in perspective.

    Thanks!
    .-= Jason Cohen´s last blog ..Don’t write a business plan =-.

    Reply
  3. Ali Hale says

    December 18, 2009 at 11:40 am

    Ah, Charlie, awesome questions as ever. I don’t know whether it’s an oldest-child thing or a female thing, but I often find myself trying to do stuff just to make other people happy. Or feeling that my own happiness is unimportant and that achieving something in the eyes of the world is what happens.

    I’m getting a saner, more balanced view on this one; partly reading some great bloggers (like your wonderful self) and partly through some prayer and reflection.

    Thanks for the often-needed reminder, though!
    .-= Ali Hale´s last blog ..2009: Adventures, Ventures and Lessons Learnt =-.

    Reply
    • Jason Cohen says

      December 18, 2009 at 1:16 pm

      It’s not just a female thing; I have the same instinct. I’ll bet $100 you can relate to that Inc Magazine article I mentioned in the comment above.
      .-= Jason Cohen´s last blog ..Don’t write a business plan =-.

      Reply
    • Bart says

      January 28, 2010 at 9:32 am

      I often feel the same way, Ali, doing things I’m not passionate about, but I do them anyway so the people I care about are happy.

      Charlie, you are absolutely right. In a world where we can do anything we want and achieve anything we want, we often make decisions that are more influenced by dollars than by our true desires. However, 2010 won’t be like that for me. I’ve paid my dues. It’s time to have some fun!
      .-= Bart´s last blog ..Fear Shows You Where To Go =-.

      Reply
  4. Mike Stankavich says

    December 18, 2009 at 1:17 pm

    Charlie, you’re so right. There’s a precedence that gets applied to setting priorities and choosing courses of action, and happiness is barely even on the list. Choosing something that doesn’t maximize the financial outcome or meet the expectations that others have of you because makes you happy is often labeled as selfishness. Your happiness absolutely deserves a place at the table when selecting alternatives, regardless of what others may say, well meaning or not.

    Does it trump all other considerations? No, of course not. But it deserves far more weight than it’s usually given.

    Thanks for a great reminder to watch out for that undervaluation tendency.
    .-= Mike Stankavich´s last blog ..How to Securely Access Your Home or Small Biz Network From Anywhere in the World (Part 1) =-.

    Reply
  5. Karl Staib - Work Happy Now says

    December 20, 2009 at 9:23 pm

    This post could have easily been on my blog. I’m actually a little jealous. 😉 I wish that I would have written for my blog.

    What you say is true. We make too many decisions because we think we have to, not because we want to. We need to make decisions that will meet our needs, not just appease other people.
    .-= Karl Staib – Work Happy Now´s last blog ..Hard, Fun and Beautiful – Team Work Edition =-.

    Reply
  6. Nick1254367 says

    December 23, 2009 at 9:59 am

    Hi,
    Interesting thoughts. I completely agree. However I think,

    happiness is still a tricky word. I had a shot at trying to define it

    in a more “scientific” or “objective” way, despite it being a

    subjective feeeling: What is happiness?
    I would love to hear your thoughts! Thank you, Nick

    Reply
  7. Sonia Simone says

    December 23, 2009 at 9:45 pm

    @Nick, there’s actually quite a lot of work being done now on the measurable nature of happiness. Sonia Lyobomirsky has a good and accessible review of the best research, it’s called _The How of Happiness_.

    I’ve started much more intentionally adding in “happiness goals” to my business and my life, and so far I’m enjoying the benefits! It’s a tricky thing, easy to forget.
    .-= Sonia Simone´s last blog ..What Makes Marketing Hard? =-.

    Reply
  8. The Emotion Machine says

    December 23, 2009 at 11:00 pm

    Couldn’t agree more! I would also like to add that it takes guts to be happy. It requires that we accept responsibility for our well-being, and that can be a scary thing for many people.
    .-= The Emotion Machine´s last blog ..How To Do A True Act Of Kindness =-.

    Reply
  9. Joneric says

    September 10, 2011 at 5:05 pm

    Great question there at the bottom I think. Will you let yourself be happy?

    For some the question pops up, “What is happy?”. Is it making a lot of money? Is it having the coolest new gadget every day? Is it having the best looking boy/girlfriend? Maybe the its the admiration of millions? Or the cold hate of everyone? Or could it be even simpler than that?

    To me being happy is nothing more than accepting myself for who I am. Accepting that I make mistakes, and I can live with that. Accepting that no one in life is perfect. That we are all trying to live life as best we can. This is what it means to be human.

    I might not know exactly how things are going to turn out, but I’m going to continue working towards my goals no matter what, and whatever happens I will accept the outcome.

    My happiness does not come from stuff or people outside of me, it comes from within. Its nice to have others in my life to share it with, however if I can’t accept myself as I am, how can I ever accept life as it is?

    Reply

Trackbacks

  1. Tweets that mention Your Happiness Counts -- Topsy.com says:
    December 18, 2009 at 12:02 pm

    […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Jason Cohen and HiroBoga, Charlie Gilkey. Charlie Gilkey said: Today's short post: "Your Happiness Counts" http://bit.ly/74f6wf Funny how we don't apply simple truths… […]

    Reply
  2. uberVU - social comments says:
    December 18, 2009 at 2:20 pm

    Social comments and analytics for this post…

    This post was mentioned on Twitter by CharlieGilkey: Today’s short post: “Your Happiness Counts” http://bit.ly/74f6wf Funny how we don’t apply simple truths……

    Reply
  3. Step 1 of being happy in life says:
    December 18, 2009 at 9:55 pm

    […] listening to an audio by a well known motivational speaker and he was talking about the 3 steps to happiness in our lives. The first one was […]

    Reply
  4. Theme of the Week - More Listening Less Talking | Work Happy Now! says:
    December 20, 2009 at 9:25 pm

    […] * Charlie of Productive Flourishing nailed it square between the happiness eyes with his post Your Happiness Counts. […]

    Reply
  5. Planning 2010’s Projects ”” Aliventures says:
    January 4, 2010 at 12:44 pm

    […] learnt that I need to take time to rest and recharge if I’m going to work effectively. Plus, as Charlie Gilkey and others have gently reminded me in recent months, my happiness […]

    Reply
  6. What Are You Denying Yourself? says:
    March 22, 2010 at 7:55 am

    […] me are happy – which is true, but it’s not the whole picture! Charlie Gilkey’s post Your Happiness Counts really struck a chord with me: “Being happy counts. Feeling good counts. Enjoying the moment […]

    Reply
  7. What Are You Denying Yourself? | MyMindMagazine says:
    April 9, 2010 at 6:16 pm

    […] me are happy – which is true, but it’s not the whole picture! Charlie Gilkey’s post Your Happiness Counts really struck a chord with me: “Being happy counts. Feeling good counts. Enjoying the moment […]

    Reply
  8. 8 Ways To Work Smarter and Be Happier | The Mogul Mom says:
    July 18, 2010 at 10:12 am

    […] everything that’s going on, just remember that your happiness counts and you are not a robot. Be as compassionate to yourself as you are to those around you; “to […]

    Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Primary Sidebar

Are you a visionary, designer, or creator?

Discover Your Productivity Persona!

Take the free Momentum Quiz

On the Blog

Reeling, Organizing, and Marching are All Distinct Projects

Read More →

World Productivity Day 2022

Read More →

Before the Crisis, There Was Abundance

Read More →

How Much Is Indecision Costing You?

Read More →

Footer

  • Podcast
  • Momentum app
  • Books
  • New Here
  • Contact
  • Press
  • Site Terms

Follow or contact us with the links below:

  • LinkedIn
  • Twitter
  • YouTube

Copyright © 2022 Productive Flourishing.  All Rights Reserved.

15 shares