What Really Matters?
Making tough choices on this question will support who and what you want to be
I’ve shared in a few other Anchors some of the lessons and gifts I’ve taken from the paradigm shift that is COVID. Some lessons have been hard to learn; others have been welcome surprises; and still, yet others have been surprisingly easy.
(I say surprisingly easy as I have the annoying habit of making the simple and easy a lot harder than they need to be sometimes. But, you wouldn’t know anything about that, right?!) ;-)
One of those surprisingly easy things that have manifested for me is how much better I am these days at giving energy to what really matters.
OK, so now that I’m saying it’s been surprisingly easy, upon a bit more reflection, I realize that a more accurate portrayal is this: I have been able to let go of what doesn’t really matter more easily more often (read here: I still have a lot of work to do and it could be MUCH MORE often) than I would have thought possible for me just a few months ago.
So, while it’s true that I still have a ways to go in this area, I have made significant progress in just a short time. Yay! And y’all, this is actually a really big and important shift for me! Yay, again!!!
I have struggled all my life with focusing too much of my energy and effort on things that at the end of the day/week/year/my lifetime just don’t deserve as much of my finite energy and time as they have received.
I’ve worried about getting the laundry put away when what I really needed at the time was a nap.
I’ve worried about the dishes being put away when what I really needed was a bit more time in nature.
I’ve worried about finishing the yard project by a certain day (which was totally made up in my head) rather than spending the far too few days off with Charlie on a day hike and time around the campfire.
I’ve worried about making the fully homemade meal with all the special sides that take forever to make when what I really needed was just a simple, healthy meal that would have taken half the time.
I’ve worried about getting that lingering task done TODAY rather than cuddling with Petie who brings me so much love and joy.
I’ve worried about making a special celebration perfect rather than spending the time of the celebration with the people that matter.
There are times I learned my lessons very easily, took them to heart, and made important changes in my life. There are other times where the lessons have been so hard to learn and I repeated the same pattern (and sometimes the same pain) over and over again.
I think this lesson — the one about focusing on what really matters — has been a bit of both. It’s a lesson that my higher self has been trying to get me to learn for a very long time now, so in that sense, it’s the “repeat over and over again” of unaligned priorities and perhaps the “easy” part of this is more so that I’ve found myself in a place where I see differently than I used to — so it just feels easier to make better choices.
Whether it’s because I just don’t have as much in the energetic tank or the world’s energy is zapping more of my own internal energy, or with age comes wisdom and shifts in priorities, or that COVID and the uprisings are forcing another level of consciousness, or perhaps with all of these… I have found myself more often in a place I have not been before: a place of making smart decisions for myself about where my energy goes, and that it’s going to the things that matter the most.
I find myself asking these questions more and more:
What really matters right now?
What do I need? (Often I need to sit with this for a while to get to what I REALLY need. Reminder to self: the answer is always in your best interests, so if that’s not clearly seen in your answer you’re gonna need to sit with this longer… sigh and thank you)
What can give?
And, again, what really matters right now?
More than ever before I’ve found myself answering those questions in ways that are more focused on self-care, self-love, self-kindness, and self-compassion.
Rather than putting away the laundry, I’ve taken a nap.
Rather than putting away the dishes, I’ve taken a walk.
Rather than weeding the yard, I’ve gone on a hike with Charlie.
Rather than the elaborate meal, I’ve gone with a simple meal or even delivery.
Rather than responding to the five emails today, I let them sit until Monday and I’ve cuddled with Petie.
Rather than the perfect celebration for a loved one, I’ve made one even more meaningful that was much more simple.
For every one of us, there has been so much in the last five months that has been awful and challenging and hard and scary and that we would much rather have not happened. I know for myself it has been all that, but I have also walked away with an amazing gift that my higher self has been trying to get me to accept for a very long time: an easier acceptance of what really matters and a radical change in alignment of accepting and allowing, along with making choices that more lovingly support who and what I want to be.
This will continue to be something I work on, but I am so damn proud of myself that I am finally, finally allowing and accepting what I wish I would have many years ago.
So, I ask this of you: what really matters right now?
And, do you accept and allow that you are 100% worthy of doing and being with what really matters right now?
(a ❤️ note from me to you: because you are 100% worthy)