The thought of an icky leech crawling on them makes most people shudder. It’s such a horrible thought! To have this ribby, squirmy, somehow-stuck-to-you thing sucking your blood…gross!
Okay, wormy things are a bit creepy. But there are other types of leeches that do far worse things to you than suck your blood and fall off. There are emotional leeches, productivity leeches, and financial leeches to contend with, as well.
It’s helpful to know how to remove any of the leeches from you, just in case you ever get one attached. This three-part series will give you tips on identifying and removing them. This first part covers real leeches and emotional leeches.
[Introductory Sidebar: The trick here is to understand the difference between those people you can help and who'll help you and those people who are just draining your energy, time, and money. I am in no way implying that you shouldn't help others or that all people who need help are leeches.]
How to Identify and Remove a Real Leech
Description: Leeches are worm-like predatory invertebrates which live in fresh water, marine water, and on land. They survive by sucking on and ingesting the nutrients from their hosts.
Removal:
- Recognize that you have a leech on you
- Find out where it’s actually attached:
- Place a fingernail down next to the oral sucker and slowly push it away.
- Once the leech is detached from your body, get rid of immediately, as it will try to reattach itself.
Leeches secrete an anesthetic so their hosts are unaware of their presence. If you feel something on you and try to remove it only to find that it will not come off on its own accord, you probably have a leech. You could also have a tick, but those aren’t wormlike.
The leech is attached by an oral sucker at its skinny end, not by the gripped on the fat end.
Do not grab a leech by its fat end and pull, as this may cause the leech to regurgitate and cause further infection. It is also inadvisable to burn or place chemical agents on the leech, as this may also cause it to regurgitate.
The leech may curl up and reattach itself to your finger. A sudden, forceful flick should remove the leech from your finger.
Notes:
- A leech will feed on you as long as it can or until it is full. At that point, the leech will drop off, as your blood will provide subsistence for it for several months.
- The relatively small amount of blood sucked by the leech will not cause death. The wound will heal after several hours if it is properly cleaned. The aggregate effect of many leeches may drain you and decrease your physical performance
- Leeches require a relatively flat, stable surface to attach themselves to. They are generally found in still water, on docks, and in other places where they can move themselves to potential hosts.
- Leeches have incredible senses and can sense heat and movement up to ten feet away. Keep moving and wear clothing that covers your skin in order to avoid leech bites.
How to Remove and Identify an Emotional Leech
Description: Emotional leeches are people drain your emotional energy. Some variants include the Drama Queen, the Continual Crisis Crackhead, and the Complaining Coworker. Be careful of the families of emotional leeches, for the family may breed and propagate leechdom.
Removal:
- Recognize that you have a leech on you
- Find out where it’s actually attached
- Calmly inform the leech that you can no longer provide it emotional support.
- Once the leech is detached from you, get rid of it immediately, as it will try to reattach itself.
It’s sometimes hard to recognize a leech because it initially may provide a shoulder to cry on or an ear to listen to your problems. However, once a leech attaches itself, you will find that you become emotionally drained around it every time it is in your proximity. If you find yourself avoiding contact with a person because s/he brings you down, odds are you have an emotional leech.
Emotional leeches normally exploit an admirable trait that you have and thus make that trait a flaw. For example, if you are the type of person that will talk to anyone if it makes their day feel better, the leech harnesses that trait and always find you to talk to. If you give good advice, the leech will approach you under the ruse of needing advice. Find out why and how the leech is attached to you before you attempt to remove it. (See notes below)
If you approach the leech the wrong way, it may regurgitate on you and make you feel like crap. If you have not identified how it is attached to you, it will only dig in deeper and make itself all the harder to remove in the future. Under no circumstance should you blow up or become emotionally hostile with the leech, as it will definitely regurgitate on you and make you feel like crap.
The leech will attempt to make contact with you again, since it will think that you were having a bad day or some such. Avoid the leech whenever possible, and do not answer phone calls unless you absolutely have to. If the leech begins sucking on you again, quickly detach it before it fully reattaches.
Notes:
- An emotional leech will feed on you for as long as it can or until it is full. At that point, it will find something else to do, as your energy will provide subsistence for it for several days.
- Emotional leeches that are removed poorly will find a way to reattach themselves. Successive attempts to remove leeches become increasingly difficult, as your emotional reserve and ability to fight them is diminished every time they reattach themselves.
- The relatively small amount of energy sucked by the emotional leech will not cause you too much harm. You will recover your energy after several hours if you have proper ways to recharge your emotional reserve. The aggregate effect of many emotional leeches may drain you and cause depression.
- Emotional leeches require a relatively stable, happy person to attach themselves to. They are generally found in places where people are having a good time, as it is easier for them to spot potential hosts.
- Emotional leeches are incredibly perceptive and can sense happiness and helpfulness from across a crowded room. Keep moving and interacting with people in order to avoid their attaching themselves to you.
The next part of this series covers The Identification and Removal of Productivity Leeches. Stay tuned!
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6 comments ↓
Ah darn it. According to your points you made, that makes me an emotional leech (I’m guessing it makes me a leech for the other two as well.) That’s a right bummer as I never realised.
Well it’s a cool and well written post.
@ Chris: I sincerely doubt that you’re a leech, as most leeches won’t read about their leechy ways. Or if they do, they’ll rationalize their leechy behavior and blame it on someone else.
If, on the odd chance, you are a leech, make one small change a day to remove yourself from your hosts. The easiest way: find small things that provide value to them.
Thanks for the comment! I hope to hear from you in the future.
My boss is an emotional leech. I sincerely think that the main reason I was hired was to share this office with her (with one cubicle divider) so that I could be the constant, captive audience to her continuous complaining and negativity. Sometimes, I feel like nasty, living black goop (like in Spiderman 3) is growing all over me and I can feel the negativity taking me over like a bad rash. I am not quite sure how to deal with it. I try to appear very busy when she wants to “chat” but it doesn’t work. She will plop down in the chair next to my desk and start complaining about every aspect of our job, the weather, her drapes at home, or anything else she can think of. I am normally an upbeat, positive person and after 6 months on the job, she is beginning to drag me down considerably and even affect my personal life.
Any advice for me on how to deal with her?
@ Megz: That’s a tough situation. I’ll be emailing you to get more information to see if I can help.
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Great commentary. Informative, funny, and entertaining. Wonderfully put together.
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